i stay still in my dreams.
i wake up and i'm drowning under the bed.

i drown. i hide.
playing catch up with myself.

find me i scream.
i don't get a reply.

i blare i'm here.
i don't seem to listen.

i swim out of the sea.
i am scarred. i am here.

where is 'here'?
i rover around on a crab.

i dig around into a shell.
i cant find myself.

passing thought : 'i cant imagine star fishes suck the stars out of u. they never would.'

passing thought passes me a bottle swimming out to me.
i scream into the bottle. find me. it screams back at me. louder though.
no rolled paper, no story, no history drips out of the bottle.
plain sand. and a living being, so minute that u cant even see it breathing.

i curl it around my finger and pull it for a dance. a dancing mountain breathing no snow. crabs peep out. i crush the mounds under my dancing feet. rejoice.
relapse. a mutiny. sands walking out to me. streams sliding me underneath.

i am drowning again.
find me. i cant.
i drown every waking minute.
i cant see myself dying. i can always feel it.

long live crabs. crap.

passing thought: teach the crabs to walk. i wouldn't eat someone who can't even walk straight.